When you follow a bunch of people on tumblr and they're all friends with each other and they're really goddamn cool and funny but you're not part of the group so you just sit back and laugh at all the jokes they make to each other with your "forever alone" face on.
in japan it’s the 1st of february, which, as everyone knows, is ruki’s 29th birthday.
i could write a long post here, but everyone else has written theirs so well, so i’ll try to keep it short:
ruki means to lot as me as a person, and i’ve realised this especially in the past year, which has so far been one of the worst years i’ve had. i went through some horrible times, started going through depression, i developed the horrible habit of self-harm and even thought about suicide a few times- but, through it all, he’s been there. i’m still going through many of those things right now, but, unlike people i know personally in my life, his music and his voice aren’t going to suddenly fade away. the gazette’s music and his voice are one of the key things that have kept me going, preserving the little hope that’s in me. his various achievements in the years i have known about him are what have given me the drive to continue reaching for my dreams, which although seem far off right now, are actually something i really want to do if i am to get better.
it is for reasons like this that i could never thank him enough, but for now all i can do is wish him a very happy birthday, full of the smiles and laughter that are close to my heart.
thank you, ruki. happy birthday. you deserve it. ♥